Sign of the Blue Cicada: How to manage when traveling with Children

Ugh. I've spent the last two weeks (ok, almost 3 now) trying to get a handle on Kyoto so I can post something coherent, and not just be a boring travelogue. I took 1484 photos, a few worth looking at, but a lot of dross. We visited eight Buddhist temples, a few of them several times, four Shinto shrines, two palaces, and various and sundry other sites. There was so much to see and do, to experience and think about. We managed to avoid the "if it is Tuesday, that must be the Acropolis" mode of sightseeing only because we were there for so long and had to do things at the pace of three year old. I'd advise anyone to travel with a small child. Slows you down, keeps you from over doing it, makes sure you find out where the grocery stores, bathrooms and laundry facilities are located. Pronto. It gives you an excuse to be a fuddy duddy without being accused of being high maintenance. And you get to take naps if you want to. And you are invisible, people only see your cute children. Except when they throw a hissy fit in public, in which case, you get to learn about humility. And forgiveness. I've come up with a few guidelines that work for me that might work for you, too, if traveling with kids.

1. Know your limitations. Know their limitations.

This is the most fundamental rule to happiness. You might be able to spend hours hiking in the hills trying to get the perfect light for that once in a lifetime photograph. They can’t. They can spend hours digging in the sand, while you get bored after 15 minutes (admit it, you do). Plan most activities based on the person with the strictest limitations. You will all be happier not listening to whining, and you can push happy people to do new things a lot easier than dragging unhappy ones.

2. Feed them.

Find snacks and familiar food, and keep it handy. Everyone is happier with a full tummy. I have children who are very blood sugar sensitive. Moods degenerate quickly, and the capacity to handle change diminishes with low blood sugar.

When making meals, anything familiar that they like will do as a meal backbone. Then you can slip them something odd and they might try it. And, if they won’t today, they will tomorrow because they will be hungry! It also helps to have a little of something truly vile on hand to use as a “Well, at least we don’t have to eat this!” The steamed yam looks really good next to the dried fish!

3. Find the playgrounds

I try to build in a visit to a playground or a park or open place where the kids can play and move most days. If we do this, then we can get in a visit to a temple or shrine or garden, too, without complaints.

4. Use your cute kids to meet people.

Many people have spoken to us that wouldn’t have if I had been alone. I’ve met other mothers, lots of grandparents, and people who are simply thrilled to meet foreigners. If you have a young child with you, you are instantly less threatening and more approachable than a foreigner on their own. I find that I am braver about trying things, too, because I have to put on a good face for the kids.

5. Bribe them with exotic treats

This is such a powerful option, save it for when you really need it. Small toys, incomprehensible lollipops, one Yen coins, those sweet pastry like things that the lady at the stall gave you to sample, drinks machine beverages. Again, very powerful, use with extreme caution and frugality or it will lose its power. A trip back to the science museum was the most effective bribe-for-goodness so far, but a trip to the Ghibli Museum is working pretty well, too.

6. Get silly- see how many different turtles there are made of stones in the temple path, count the stairs, pretend to be monkeys, attempt to balance out on the teeter totters, watch TV and make up dialogue.

7. Motrin and a soaking tub. When none of this works, and someone has a trying day, there is always Motrin. And, the Japanese have perfected the art of bathing. There is no higher pinnacle of civilization than the Japanese soaking tub. Period. Forget writing, printing presses, Nintendo Wii, no, the soaking tub trumps them all.

Below I've posted a few more sightseeing photos. I encourage everyone to google the place names and read more about these strange, lovely, very different places. I'll post more . . .